Today, I sat in a patient room (with my husband) being educated on radiation therapy for cancer patients. I learned that a patient can only be treated once in a particular area. Matt’s radiation treatments will be localized to his neck and through his cheek to his tongue. After this course of treatments, that will last 5 days a week for 6 weeks, he will never be able to have radiation again in that area. A metal/mesh mask will be made to fit his face/head to keep his head still while he is in his treatments.
The doctor walked us through each step of the process. Then, she started speaking of side effects. I huge lump formed in my throat and tears filled my eyes when she told Matt that after 2-3 weeks of treatments, he will be in total pain. His mouth will be filled with blisters at the area of treatment and the outside of his face and neck will be much like a horrible sunburn. Before I could even clear my throat to speak, Matt asked how he was going to be able to preach. The doctor just shook her head. She said it will be extremely painful and that head and neck radiation was the hardest treatment to endure. I literally just sat stunned knowing exactly what my self-less husband, pastor of Paragon Church, was thinking. How was he going to do what God has called him to do?
Lots of people have been asking how I am doing. I’ll be honest, I am sick to my stomach over all of this. I have lots of fears, questions, and even a cry fest almost every day. I am human and someone I love with every ounce of my being is hurting. It breaks my heart to see what my husband has to endure over the next few months. But even in my sadness, I have to remember where my hope comes from. I cannot “grieve like people who have no hope” (I Thessalonians 4:13-15) We serve a mighty God that could rid Matt’s body of every cancer cell IF that was HIS WILL. God has a magnificent plan for my Matt Sellers and it’s far from over. God will be glorified and all honor will be given to Him. We sang a song in church on Sunday and I keep singing this truth over and over this week.
The doctor walked us through each step of the process. Then, she started speaking of side effects. I huge lump formed in my throat and tears filled my eyes when she told Matt that after 2-3 weeks of treatments, he will be in total pain. His mouth will be filled with blisters at the area of treatment and the outside of his face and neck will be much like a horrible sunburn. Before I could even clear my throat to speak, Matt asked how he was going to be able to preach. The doctor just shook her head. She said it will be extremely painful and that head and neck radiation was the hardest treatment to endure. I literally just sat stunned knowing exactly what my self-less husband, pastor of Paragon Church, was thinking. How was he going to do what God has called him to do?
Lots of people have been asking how I am doing. I’ll be honest, I am sick to my stomach over all of this. I have lots of fears, questions, and even a cry fest almost every day. I am human and someone I love with every ounce of my being is hurting. It breaks my heart to see what my husband has to endure over the next few months. But even in my sadness, I have to remember where my hope comes from. I cannot “grieve like people who have no hope” (I Thessalonians 4:13-15) We serve a mighty God that could rid Matt’s body of every cancer cell IF that was HIS WILL. God has a magnificent plan for my Matt Sellers and it’s far from over. God will be glorified and all honor will be given to Him. We sang a song in church on Sunday and I keep singing this truth over and over this week.
Our God is greater
Our God is stronger
God, You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer awesome in power
Our God, our God
Psalm 16:8
I know the Lord is always with me.
I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me.
2 comments:
Christy:
Thank you for your transparency! Prayers are going up on your behalf as well. May God's sustaining grace be yours in super-abundance! See Ephesians 3:14-21
All of our love and prayers,
Coach and Kaye
I am so sorry to hear what you, your hubby and your family are going through. A friend of mine posted your blog link on FB & I decided to check it out. Here's a great scripture to hang onto:
"He only is my rock & my salvation: He is my defence; I shall not be moved." Psalm 62:6
When the enemy tries to tell you that God is not hearing your prayers or that you have every right to be depressed, angry, scared, etc., you throw at him Psalm 62:6 and let God's Word be your sword!
Also, search YouTube for Marty Goetz He is my Defence, because he set this verse to song. It's absolutely a God-inspired song! I promise it will bless you.
My prayers are with you!
Sincerely,
Cathy
A Sister-in-Christ
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